Riley’s life was supposed to be very different in the beginning! Find out how on TMS!
When I was a little kid watching Return of the Jedi for the first time, I turned to my father when Malakili started weeping over his dead rancor and asked “Why is that guy crying?”
He said “Because it was his pet."
And with the sudden awesome realization that it was possible to have a horrible monster for a pet, and that bit characters have feelings too (see our love for The Venture Bros.), came a few terrible moments of hating Luke Skywalker’s guts.
So… Hasbro sent us a lightsaber…? And…? We have to give it away?
I mean we have to use it as a contest prize, for our readers. And not keep it with the foam swords that we use to give outgoing interns a sabre arch. That’s the responsible thing to do.
/strokes the lightsaber
/cries